CHAPTER 10.

by Mary Wollstonecraft

　　PARENTAL AFFECTION.Parental affection is, perhaps, the blindest modification ofperverse self-love; for we have not, like the French two terms(L'amour propre, L'amour de soi meme) to distinguish the pursuit ofa natural and reasonable desire, from the ignorant calculations ofweakness. Parents often love their children in the most brutalmanner, and sacrifice every relative duty to promote theiradvancement in the world. To promote, such is the perversity ofunprincipled prejudices, the future welfare of the very beingswhose present existence they imbitter by the most despotic stretchof power. Power, in fact, is ever true to its vital principle, forin every shape it would reign without controul or inquiry. Itsthrone is built across a dark abyss, which no eye must dare toexplore, lest the baseless fabric should totter underinvestigation. Obedience, unconditional obedience, is thecatch-word of tyrants of every description, and to render"assurance doubly sure," one kind of despotism supports another.Tyrants would have cause to tremble if reason were to become therule of duty in any of the relations of life, for the light mightspread till perfect day appeared. And when it did appear, howwould men smile at the sight of the bugbears at which they startedduring the night of ignorance, or the twilight of timid inquiry.

　　Parental affection, indeed, in many minds, is but a pretext totyrannize where it can be done with impunity, for only good andwise men are content with the respect that will bear discussion.Convinced that they have a right to what they insist on, they donot fear reason, or dread the sifting of subjects that recur tonatural justice: because they firmly believe, that the moreenlightened the human mind becomes, the deeper root will just andsimple principles take. They do not rest in expedients, or grantthat what is metaphysically true can be practically false; butdisdaining the shifts of the moment they calmly wait till time,sanctioning innovation, silences the hiss of selfishness or envy.

　　If the power of reflecting on the past, and darting the keen eye ofcontemplation into futurity, be the grand privilege of man, it mustbe granted that some people enjoy this prerogative in a verylimited degree. Every thing now appears to them wrong; and notable to distinguish the possible from the monstrous, they fearwhere no fear should find a place, running from the light of reasonas if it were a firebrand; yet the limits of the possible havenever been defined to stop the sturdy innovator's hand.

　　Woman, however, a slave in every situation to prejudice seldomexerts enlightened maternal affection; for she either neglects herchildren, or spoils them by improper indulgence. Besides, theaffection of some women for their children is, as I have beforetermed it, frequently very brutish; for it eradicates every sparkof humanity. Justice, truth, every thing is sacrificed by theseRebekahs, and for the sake of their own children they violate themost sacred duties, forgetting the common relationship that bindsthe whole family on earth together. Yet, reason seems to say, thatthey who suffer one duty, or affection to swallow up the rest, havenot sufficient heart or mind to fulfil that one conscientiously.It then loses the venerable aspect of a duty, and assumes thefantastic form of a whim.

　　As the care of children in their infancy is one of the grand dutiesannexed to the female character by nature, this duty would affordmany forcible arguments for strengthening the female understanding,if it were properly considered.

　　The formation of the mind must be begun very early, and the temper,in particular, requires the most judicious attention—an attentionwhich women cannot pay who only love their children because theyare their children, and seek no further for the foundation of theirduty, than in the feelings of the moment. It is this want ofreason in their affections which makes women so often run intoextremes, and either be the most fond, or most careless andunnatural mothers.

　　To be a good mother—a woman must have sense, and that independenceof mind which few women possess who are taught to depend entirelyon their husbands. Meek wives are, in general, foolish mothers;wanting their children to love them best, and take their part, insecret, against the father, who is held up as a scarecrow. If theyare to be punished, though they have offended the mother, thefather must inflict the punishment; he must be the judge in alldisputes: but I shall more fully discuss this subject when I treatof private education, I now only mean to insist, that unless theunderstanding of woman be enlarged, and her character rendered morefirm, by being allowed to govern her own conduct, she will neverhave sufficient sense or command of temper to manage her childrenproperly. Her parental affection, indeed, scarcely deserves thename, when it does not lead her to suckle her children, because thedischarge of this duty is equally calculated to inspire maternaland filial affection; and it is the indispensable duty of men andwomen to fulfil the duties which give birth to affections that arethe surest preservatives against vice. Natural affection, as it istermed, I believe to be a very weak tie, affections must grow outof the habitual exercise of a mutual sympathy; and what sympathydoes a mother exercise who sends her babe to a nurse, and onlytakes it from a nurse to send it to a school?

　　In the exercise of their natural feelings, providence has furnishedwomen with a natural substitute for love, when the lover becomesonly a friend and mutual confidence takes place of overstrainedadmiration—a child then gently twists the relaxing cord, and amutual care produces a new mutual sympathy. But a child, though apledge of affection, will not enliven it, if both father and motherare content to transfer the charge to hirelings; for they who dotheir duty by proxy should not murmur if they miss the reward ofduty—parental affection produces filial duty.