Careers

by Robert Graves

　　Father is quite the greatest poet That ever lived anywhere. You say you're going to write great music— I chose that first: it's unfair. Besides, now I can't be the greatest painter and do Christ and angels, or lovely pears and apples and grapes on a green dish, or storms at sea, or anything lovely, Because that's been taken by Claire. It's stupid to be an engine-driver, And soldiers are horrible men. I won't be a tailor, I won't be a sailor, And gardener's taken by Ben. It's unfair if you say that you'll write great music, you horrid, you unkind (I simply loathe you, though you are my sister), you beast, cad, coward, cheat, bully, liar! Well? Say what's left for me then! But we won't go to your ugly music. (Listen!) Ben will garden and dig, And Claire will finish her wondrous pictures All flaming and splendid and big. And I'll be a perfectly marvellous carpenter, and I'll make cupboards and benches and tables and ... and baths, and nice wooden boxes for studs and money, And you'll be jealous, you pig!