Book Four: 1806 - Chapter VII

by Leo Tolstoy

　　Two months had elapsed since the news of the battle of Austerlitzand the loss of Prince Andrew had reached Bald Hills, and in spiteof the letters sent through the embassy and all the searches made, hisbody had not been found nor was he on the list of prisoners. Whatwas worst of all for his relations was the fact that there was still apossibility of his having been picked up on the battlefield by thepeople of the place and that he might now be lying, recovering ordying, alone among strangers and unable to send news of himself. Thegazettes from which the old prince first heard of the defeat atAusterlitz stated, as usual very briefly and vaguely, that afterbrilliant engagements the Russians had had to retreat and had madetheir withdrawal in perfect order. The old prince understood from thisofficial report that our army had been defeated. A week after thegazette report of the battle of Austerlitz came a letter fromKutuzov informing the prince of the fate that had befallen his son.

　　"Your son," wrote Kutuzov, "fell before my eyes, a standard in hishand and at the head of a regiment- he fell as a hero, worthy of hisfather and his fatherland. To the great regret of myself and of thewhole army it is still uncertain whether he is alive or not. I comfortmyself and you with the hope that your son is alive, for otherwisehe would have been mentioned among the officers found on the fieldof battle, a list of whom has been sent me under flag of truce."

　　After receiving this news late in the evening, when he was alonein his study, the old prince went for his walk as usual nextmorning, but he was silent with his steward, the gardener, and thearchitect, and though he looked very grim he said nothing to anyone.

　　When Princess Mary went to him at the usual hour he was working athis lathe and, as usual, did not look round at her.

　　"Ah, Princess Mary!" he said suddenly in an unnatural voice,throwing down his chisel. (The wheel continued to revolve by its ownimpetus, and Princess Mary long remembered the dying creak of thatwheel, which merged in her memory with what followed.)

　　She approached him, saw his face, and something gave way within her.Her eyes grew dim. By the expression of her father's face, not sad,not crushed, but angry and working unnaturally, she saw that hangingover her and about to crush her was some terrible misfortune, theworst in life, one she had not yet experienced, irreparable andincomprehensible- the death of one she loved.

　　"Father! Andrew!"- said the ungraceful, awkward princess with suchan indescribable charm of sorrow and self-forgetfulness that herfather could not bear her look but turned away with a sob.

　　"Bad news! He's not among the prisoners nor among the killed!Kutuzov writes..." and he screamed as piercingly as if he wished todrive the princess away by that scream... "Killed!"

　　The princess did not fall down or faint. She was already pale, buton hearing these words her face changed and something brightened inher beautiful, radiant eyes. It was as if joy- a supreme joy apartfrom the joys and sorrows of this world- overflowed the great griefwithin her. She forgot all fear of her father, went up to him, tookhis hand, and drawing him down put her arm round his thin, scraggyneck.

　　"Father" she said, "do not turn away from me, let us weep together."

　　"Scoundrels! Blackguards!" shrieked the old man, turning his faceaway from her. "Destroying the army, destroying the men! And why?Go, go and tell Lise."

　　The princess sank helplessly into an armchair beside her fatherand wept. She saw her brother now as he had been at the moment when hetook leave of her and of Lise, his look tender yet proud. She sawhim tender and amused as he was when he put on the little icon. "Didhe believe? Had he repented of his unbelief? Was he now there? Therein the realms of eternal peace and blessedness?" she thought.

　　"Father, tell me how it happened," she asked through her tears.

　　"Go! Go! Killed in battle, where the best of Russian men andRussia's glory were led to destruction. Go, Princess Mary. Go and tellLise. I will follow."

　　When Princess Mary returned from her father, the little princess satworking and looked up with that curious expression of inner, happycalm peculiar to pregnant women. It was evident that her eyes didnot see Princess Mary but were looking within... into herself... atsomething joyful and mysterious taking place within her.

　　"Mary," she said, moving away from the embroidery frame and lyingback, "give me your hand." She took her sister-in-law's hand andheld it below her waist.

　　Her eyes were smiling expectantly, her downy lip rose and remainedlifted in childlike happiness.

　　Princess Mary knelt down before her and hid her face in the folds ofher sister-in-law's dress.

　　"There, there! Do you feel it? I feel so strange. And do you know,Mary, I am going to love him very much," said Lise, looking withbright and happy eyes at her sister-in-law.

　　Princess Mary could not lift her head, she was weeping.

　　"What is the matter, Mary?"

　　"Nothing... only I feel sad... sad about Andrew," she said, wipingaway her tears on her sister-in-law's knee.

　　Several times in the course of the morning Princess Mary begantrying to prepare her sister-in-law, and every time began to cry.Unobservant as was the little princess, these tears, the cause ofwhich she did not understand, agitated her. She said nothing butlooked about uneasily as if in search of something. Before dinnerthe old prince, of whom she was always afraid, came into her room witha peculiarly restless and malign expression and went out again withoutsaying a word. She looked at Princess Mary, then sat thinking for awhile with that expression of attention to something within her thatis only seen in pregnant women, and suddenly began to cry.

　　"Has anything come from Andrew?" she asked.

　　"No, you know it's too soon for news. But my father is anxious and Ifeel afraid."

　　"So there's nothing?"

　　"Nothing," answered Princess Mary, looking firmly with her radianteyes at her sister-in-law.

　　She had determined not to tell her and persuaded her father tohide the terrible news from her till after her confinement, whichwas expected within a few days. Princess Mary and the old princeeach bore and hid their grief in their own way. The old prince wouldnot cherish any hope: he made up his mind that Prince Andrew hadbeen killed, and though he sent an official to Austria to seek fortraces of his son, he ordered a monument from Moscow which he intendedto erect in his own garden to his memory, and he told everybody thathis son had been killed. He tried not to change his former way oflife, but his strength failed him. He walked less, ate less, sleptless, and became weaker every day. Princess Mary hoped. She prayed forher brother as living and was always awaiting news of his return.