Book Three: 1805 - Chapter V

by Leo Tolstoy

　　They all separated, but, except Anatole who fell asleep as soon ashe got into bed, all kept awake a long time that night.

　　"Is he really to be my husband, this stranger who is so kind- yes,kind, that is the chief thing," thought Princess Mary; and fear, whichshe had seldom experienced, came upon her. She feared to look round,it seemed to her that someone was there standing behind the screenin the dark corner. And this someone was he- the devil- and he wasalso this man with the white forehead, black eyebrows, and red lips.

　　She rang for her maid and asked her to sleep in her room.

　　Mademoiselle Bourienne walked up and down the conservatory for along time that evening, vainly expecting someone, now smiling atsomeone, now working herself up to tears with the imaginary words ofher pauvre mere rebuking her for her fall.

　　The little princess grumbled to her maid that her bed was badlymade. She could not lie either on her face or on her side. Everyposition was awkward and uncomfortable, and her burden oppressed hernow more than ever because Anatole's presence had vividly recalledto her the time when she was not like that and when everything waslight and gay. She sat in an armchair in her dressing jacket andnightcap and Katie, sleepy and disheveled, beat and turned the heavyfeather bed for the third time, muttering to herself.

　　"I told you it was all lumps and holes!" the little princessrepeated. "I should be glad enough to fall asleep, so it's not myfault!" and her voice quivered like that of a child about to cry.

　　The old prince did not sleep either. Tikhon, half asleep, heardhim pacing angrily about and snorting. The old prince felt as thoughhe had been insulted through his daughter. The insult was the morepointed because it concerned not himself but another, his daughter,whom he loved more than himself. He kept telling himself that he wouldconsider the whole matter and decide what was right and how heshould act, but instead of that he only excited himself more and more.

　　"The first man that turns up- she forgets her father andeverything else, runs upstairs and does up her hair and wags hertail and is unlike herself! Glad to throw her father over! And sheknew I should notice it. Fr... fr... fr! And don't I see that thatidiot had eyes only for Bourienne- I shall have to get rid of her. Andhow is it she has not pride enough to see it? If she has no pridefor herself she might at least have some for my sake! She must beshown that the blockhead thinks nothing of her and looks only atBourienne. No, she has no pride... but I'll let her see...."

　　The old prince knew that if he told his daughter she was making amistake and that Anatole meant to flirt with Mademoiselle Bourienne,Princess Mary's self-esteem would be wounded and his point (not tobe parted from her) would be gained, so pacifying himself with thisthought, he called Tikhon and began to undress.

　　"What devil brought them here?" thought he, while Tikhon was puttingthe nightshirt over his dried-up old body and gray-haired chest. "Inever invited them. They came to disturb my life- and there is notmuch of it left."

　　"Devil take 'em!" he muttered, while his head was still covered bythe shirt.

　　Tikhon knew his master's habit of sometimes thinking aloud, andtherefore met with unaltered looks the angrily inquisitiveexpression of the face that emerged from the shirt.

　　"Gone to bed?" asked the prince.

　　Tikhon, like all good valets, instinctively knew the direction ofhis master's thoughts. He guessed that the question referred to PrinceVasili and his son.

　　"They have gone to bed and put out their lights, your excellency."

　　"No good... no good..." said the prince rapidly, and thrusting hisfeet into his slippers and his arms into the sleeves of his dressinggown, he went to the couch on which he slept.

　　Though no words had passed between Anatole and MademoiselleBourienne, they quite understood one another as to the first part oftheir romance, up to the appearance of the pauvre mere; theyunderstood that they had much to say to one another in private andso they had been seeking an opportunity since morning to meet oneanother alone. When Princess Mary went to her father's room at theusual hour, Mademoiselle Bourienne and Anatole met in theconservatory.

　　Princess Mary went to the door of the study with specialtrepidation. It seemed to her that not only did everybody know thather fate would be decided that day, but that they also knew what shethought about it. She read this in Tikhon's face and in that of PrinceVasili's valet, who made her a low bow when she met him in thecorridor carrying hot water.

　　The old prince was very affectionate and careful in his treatment ofhis daughter that morning. Princess Mary well knew this painstakingexpression of her father's. His face wore that expression when his dryhands clenched with vexation at her not understanding a sum inarithmetic, when rising from his chair he would walk away from her,repeating in a low voice the same words several times over.

　　He came to the point at once, treating her ceremoniously.

　　"I have had a proposition made me concerning you," he said with anunnatural smile. "I expect you have guessed that Prince Vasili has notcome and brought his pupil with him" (for some reason Prince Bolkonskireferred to Anatole as a "pupil") "for the sake of my beautifuleyes. Last night a proposition was made me on your account and, as youknow my principles, I refer it to you."

　　"How am I to understand you, mon pere?" said the princess, growingpale and then blushing.

　　"How understand me!" cried her father angrily. "Prince Vasilifinds you to his taste as a daughter-in-law and makes a proposal toyou on his pupil's behalf. That's how it's to be understood! 'Howunderstand it'!... And I ask you!"

　　"I do not know what you think, Father," whispered the princess.

　　"I? I? What of me? Leave me out of the question. I'm not going toget married. What about you? That's what I want to know."

　　The princess saw that her father regarded the matter withdisapproval, but at that moment the thought occurred to her that herfate would be decided now or never. She lowered her eyes so as notto see the gaze under which she felt that she could not think, butwould only be able to submit from habit, and she said: "I wish only todo your will, but if I had to express my own desire..." She had notime to finish. The old prince interrupted her.

　　"That's admirable!" he shouted. "He will take you with your dowryand take Mademoiselle Bourienne into the bargain. She'll be thewife, while you..."

　　The prince stopped. He saw the effect these words had produced onhis daughter. She lowered her head and was ready to burst into tears.

　　"Now then, now then, I'm only joking!" he said. "Remember this,Princess, I hold to the principle that a maiden has a full right tochoose. I give you freedom. Only remember that your life's happinessdepends on your decision. Never mind me!"

　　"But I do not know, Father!"

　　"There's no need to talk! He receives his orders and will marryyou or anybody; but you are free to choose.... Go to your room,think it over, and come back in an hour and tell me in his presence:yes or no. I know you will pray over it. Well, pray if you like, butyou had better think it over. Go! Yes or no, yes or no, yes or no!" hestill shouted when the princess, as if lost in a fog, had alreadystaggered out of the study.

　　Her fate was decided and happily decided. But what her father hadsaid about Mademoiselle Bourienne was dreadful. It was untrue to besure, but still it was terrible, and she could not help thinking ofit. She was going straight on through the conservatory, neither seeingnor hearing anything, when suddenly the well-known whispering ofMademoiselle Bourienne aroused her. She raised her eyes, and two stepsaway saw Anatole embracing the Frenchwoman and whispering something toher. With a horrified expression on his handsome face, Anatolelooked at Princess Mary, but did not at once take his arm from thewaist of Mademoiselle Bourienne who had not yet seen her.

　　"Who's that? Why? Wait a moment!" Anatole's face seemed to say.Princess Mary looked at them in silence. She could not understandit. At last Mademoiselle Bourienne gave a scream and ran away. Anatolebowed to Princess Mary with a gay smile, as if inviting her to join ina laugh at this strange incident, and then shrugging his shoulderswent to the door that led to his own apartments.

　　An hour later, Tikhon came to call Princess Mary to the oldprince; he added that Prince Vasili was also there. When Tikhon cameto her Princess Mary was sitting on the sofa in her room, holdingthe weeping Mademoiselle Bourienne in her arms and gently stroking herhair. The princess' beautiful eyes with all their former calm radiancewere looking with tender affection and pity at MademoiselleBourienne's pretty face.

　　"No, Princess, I have lost your affection forever!" saidMademoiselle Bourienne.

　　"Why? I love you more than ever," said Princess Mary, "and I willtry to do all I can for your happiness."

　　"But you despise me. You who are so pure can never understandbeing so carried away by passion. Oh, only my poor mother..."

　　"I quite understand," answered Princess Mary, with a sad smile."Calm yourself, my dear. I will go to my father," she said, and wentout.

　　Prince Vasili, with one leg thrown high over the other and asnuffbox in his hand, was sitting there with a smile of deep emotionon his face, as if stirred to his heart's core and himselfregretting and laughing at his own sensibility, when Princess Maryentered. He hurriedly took a pinch of snuff.

　　"Ah, my dear, my dear!" he began, rising and taking her by bothhands. Then, sighing, he added: "My son's fate is in your hands.Decide, my dear, good, gentle Marie, whom I have always loved as adaughter!"

　　He drew back and a real tear appeared in his eye.

　　"Fr... fr..." snorted Prince Bolkonski. "The prince is making aproposition to you in his pupil's- I mean, his son's- name. Do youwish or not to be Prince Anatole Kuragin's wife? Reply: yes or no," heshouted, "and then I shall reserve the right to state my opinion also.Yes, my opinion, and only my opinion," added Prince Bolkonski, turningto Prince Vasili and answering his imploring look. "Yes, or no?"

　　"My desire is never to leave you, Father, never to separate mylife from yours. I don't wish to marry," she answered positively,glancing at Prince Vasili and at her father with her beautiful eyes.

　　"Humbug! Nonsense! Humbug, humbug, humbug!" cried PrinceBolkonski, frowning and taking his daughter's hand; he did not kissher, but only bending his forehead to hers just touched it, andpressed her hand so that she winced and uttered a cry.

　　Prince Vasili rose.

　　"My dear, I must tell you that this is a moment I shall never, neverforget. But, my dear, will you not give us a little hope of touchingthis heart, so kind and generous? Say 'perhaps'... The future is solong. Say 'perhaps.'"

　　"Prince, what I have said is all there is in my heart. I thank youfor the honor, but I shall never be your son's wife."

　　"Well, so that's finished, my dear fellow! I am very glad to haveseen you. Very glad! Go back to your rooms, Princess. Go!" said theold prince. "Very, very glad to glad to have seen you," repeated he,embracing Prince Vasili.

　　"My vocation is a different one," thought Princess Mary. "Myvocation is to be happy with another kind of happiness, thehappiness of love and self-sacrifice. And cost what it may, I willarrange poor Amelie's happiness, she loves him so passionately, and sopassionately repents. I will do all I can to arrange the match betweenthem. If he is not rich I will give her the means; I will ask myfather and Andrew. I shall be so happy when she is his wife. She is sounfortunate, a stranger, alone, helpless! And, oh God, howpassionately she must love him if she could so far forget herself!Perhaps I might have done the same!..." thought Princess Mary.