PART II - CHAPTER X.

by Miguel de Cervantes

　　WHEREIN IS RELATED THE CRAFTY DEVICE SANCHO ADOPTED TO ENCHANT THE LADYDULCINEA, AND OTHER INCIDENTS AS LUDICROUS AS THEY ARE TRUEWhen the author of this great history comes to relate what is set down inthis chapter he says he would have preferred to pass it over in silence,fearing it would not be believed, because here Don Quixote's madnessreaches the confines of the greatest that can be conceived, and even goesa couple of bowshots beyond the greatest. But after all, though stillunder the same fear and apprehension, he has recorded it without addingto the story or leaving out a particle of the truth, and entirelydisregarding the charges of falsehood that might be brought against him;and he was right, for the truth may run fine but will not break, andalways rises above falsehood as oil above water; and so, going on withhis story, he says that as soon as Don Quixote had ensconced himself inthe forest, oak grove, or wood near El Toboso, he bade Sancho return tothe city, and not come into his presence again without having firstspoken on his behalf to his lady, and begged of her that it might be hergood pleasure to permit herself to be seen by her enslaved knight, anddeign to bestow her blessing upon him, so that he might thereby hope fora happy issue in all his encounters and difficult enterprises. Sanchoundertook to execute the task according to the instructions, and to bringback an answer as good as the one he brought back before."Go, my son," said Don Quixote, "and be not dazed when thou findestthyself exposed to the light of that sun of beauty thou art going toseek. Happy thou, above all the squires in the world! Bear in mind, andlet it not escape thy memory, how she receives thee; if she changescolour while thou art giving her my message; if she is agitated anddisturbed at hearing my name; if she cannot rest upon her cushion,shouldst thou haply find her seated in the sumptuous state chamber properto her rank; and should she be standing, observe if she poises herselfnow on one foot, now on the other; if she repeats two or three times thereply she gives thee; if she passes from gentleness to austerity, fromasperity to tenderness; if she raises her hand to smooth her hair thoughit be not disarranged. In short, my son, observe all her actions andmotions, for if thou wilt report them to me as they were, I will gatherwhat she hides in the recesses of her heart as regards my love; for Iwould have thee know, Sancho, if thou knowest it not, that with loversthe outward actions and motions they give way to when their loves are inquestion are the faithful messengers that carry the news of what is goingon in the depths of their hearts. Go, my friend, may better fortune thanmine attend thee, and bring thee a happier issue than that which I awaitin dread in this dreary solitude.""I will go and return quickly," said Sancho; "cheer up that little heartof yours, master mine, for at the present moment you seem to have got oneno bigger than a hazel nut; remember what they say, that a stout heartbreaks bad luck, and that where there are no fletches there are no pegs;and moreover they say, the hare jumps up where it's not looked for. I saythis because, if we could not find my lady's palaces or castles to-night,now that it is daylight I count upon finding them when I least expect it,and once found, leave it to me to manage her.""Verily, Sancho," said Don Quixote, "thou dost always bring in thyproverbs happily, whatever we deal with; may God give me better luck inwhat I am anxious about."With this, Sancho wheeled about and gave Dapple the stick, and DonQuixote remained behind, seated on his horse, resting in his stirrups andleaning on the end of his lance, filled with sad and troubledforebodings; and there we will leave him, and accompany Sancho, who wentoff no less serious and troubled than he left his master; so much so,that as soon as he had got out of the thicket, and looking round saw thatDon Quixote was not within sight, he dismounted from his ass, and seatinghimself at the foot of a tree began to commune with himself, saying,"Now, brother Sancho, let us know where your worship is going. Are yougoing to look for some ass that has been lost? Not at all. Then what areyou going to look for? I am going to look for a princess, that's all; andin her for the sun of beauty and the whole heaven at once. And where doyou expect to find all this, Sancho? Where? Why, in the great city of ElToboso. Well, and for whom are you going to look for her? For the famousknight Don Quixote of La Mancha, who rights wrongs, gives food to thosewho thirst and drink to the hungry. That's all very well, but do you knowher house, Sancho? My master says it will be some royal palace or grandcastle. And have you ever seen her by any chance? Neither I nor my masterever saw her. And does it strike you that it would be just and right ifthe El Toboso people, finding out that you were here with the intentionof going to tamper with their princesses and trouble their ladies, wereto come and cudgel your ribs, and not leave a whole bone in you? Theywould, indeed, have very good reason, if they did not see that I am underorders, and that 'you are a messenger, my friend, no blame belongs toyou.' Don't you trust to that, Sancho, for the Manchegan folk are ashot-tempered as they are honest, and won't put up with liberties fromanybody. By the Lord, if they get scent of you, it will be worse for you,I promise you. Be off, you scoundrel! Let the bolt fall. Why should I golooking for three feet on a cat, to please another man; and what is more,when looking for Dulcinea will be looking for Marica in Ravena, or thebachelor in Salamanca? The devil, the devil and nobody else, has mixed meup in this business!"Such was the soliloquy Sancho held with himself, and all the conclusionhe could come to was to say to himself again, "Well, there's remedy foreverything except death, under whose yoke we have all to pass, whether welike it or not, when life's finished. I have seen by a thousand signsthat this master of mine is a madman fit to be tied, and for that matter,I too, am not behind him; for I'm a greater fool than he is when I followhim and serve him, if there's any truth in the proverb that says, 'Tellme what company thou keepest, and I'll tell thee what thou art,' or inthat other, 'Not with whom thou art bred, but with whom thou art fed.'Well then, if he be mad, as he is, and with a madness that mostly takesone thing for another, and white for black, and black for white, as wasseen when he said the windmills were giants, and the monks' mulesdromedaries, flocks of sheep armies of enemies, and much more to the sametune, it will not be very hard to make him believe that some countrygirl, the first I come across here, is the lady Dulcinea; and if he doesnot believe it, I'll swear it; and if he should swear, I'll swear again;and if he persists I'll persist still more, so as, come what may, to havemy quoit always over the peg. Maybe, by holding out in this way, I mayput a stop to his sending me on messages of this kind another time; ormaybe he will think, as I suspect he will, that one of those wickedenchanters, who he says have a spite against him, has changed her formfor the sake of doing him an ill turn and injuring him."With this reflection Sancho made his mind easy, counting the business asgood as settled, and stayed there till the afternoon so as to make DonQuixote think he had time enough to go to El Toboso and return; andthings turned out so luckily for him that as he got up to mount Dapple,he spied, coming from El Toboso towards the spot where he stood, threepeasant girls on three colts, or fillies--for the author does not makethe point clear, though it is more likely they were she-asses, the usualmount with village girls; but as it is of no great consequence, we neednot stop to prove it.To be brief, the instant Sancho saw the peasant girls, he returned fullspeed to seek his master, and found him sighing and uttering a thousandpassionate lamentations. When Don Quixote saw him he exclaimed, "Whatnews, Sancho, my friend? Am I to mark this day with a white stone or ablack?""Your worship," replied Sancho, "had better mark it with ruddle, like theinscriptions on the walls of class rooms, that those who see it may seeit plain.""Then thou bringest good news," said Don Quixote."So good," replied Sancho, "that your worship has only to spur Rocinanteand get out into the open field to see the lady Dulcinea del Toboso, who,with two others, damsels of hers, is coming to see your worship.""Holy God! what art thou saying, Sancho, my friend?" exclaimed DonQuixote. "Take care thou art not deceiving me, or seeking by false joy tocheer my real sadness.""What could I get by deceiving your worship," returned Sancho,"especially when it will so soon be shown whether I tell the truth ornot? Come, senor, push on, and you will see the princess our mistresscoming, robed and adorned--in fact, like what she is. Her damsels and sheare all one glow of gold, all bunches of pearls, all diamonds, allrubies, all cloth of brocade of more than ten borders; with their hairloose on their shoulders like so many sunbeams playing with the wind; andmoreover, they come mounted on three piebald cackneys, the finest sightever you saw.""Hackneys, you mean, Sancho," said Don Quixote."There is not much difference between cackneys and hackneys," saidSancho; "but no matter what they come on, there they are, the finestladies one could wish for, especially my lady the princess Dulcinea, whostaggers one's senses.""Let us go, Sancho, my son," said Don Quixote, "and in guerdon of thisnews, as unexpected as it is good, I bestow upon thee the best spoil Ishall win in the first adventure I may have; or if that does not satisfythee, I promise thee the foals I shall have this year from my three maresthat thou knowest are in foal on our village common.""I'll take the foals," said Sancho; "for it is not quite certain that thespoils of the first adventure will be good ones."By this time they had cleared the wood, and saw the three village lassesclose at hand. Don Quixote looked all along the road to El Toboso, and ashe could see nobody except the three peasant girls, he was completelypuzzled, and asked Sancho if it was outside the city he had left them."How outside the city?" returned Sancho. "Are your worship's eyes in theback of your head, that you can't see that they are these who are cominghere, shining like the very sun at noonday?""I see nothing, Sancho," said Don Quixote, "but three country girls onthree jackasses.""Now, may God deliver me from the devil!" said Sancho, "and can it bethat your worship takes three hackneys--or whatever they're called-aswhite as the driven snow, for jackasses? By the Lord, I could tear mybeard if that was the case!""Well, I can only say, Sancho, my friend," said Don Quixote, "that it isas plain they are jackasses--or jennyasses--as that I am Don Quixote, andthou Sancho Panza: at any rate, they seem to me to be so.""Hush, senor," said Sancho, "don't talk that way, but open your eyes, andcome and pay your respects to the lady of your thoughts, who is closeupon us now;" and with these words he advanced to receive the threevillage lasses, and dismounting from Dapple, caught hold of one of theasses of the three country girls by the halter, and dropping on bothknees on the ground, he said, "Queen and princess and duchess of beauty,may it please your haughtiness and greatness to receive into your favourand good-will your captive knight who stands there turned into marblestone, and quite stupefied and benumbed at finding himself in yourmagnificent presence. I am Sancho Panza, his squire, and he the vagabondknight Don Quixote of La Mancha, otherwise called 'The Knight of theRueful Countenance.'"Don Quixote had by this time placed himself on his knees beside Sancho,and, with eyes starting out of his head and a puzzled gaze, was regardingher whom Sancho called queen and lady; and as he could see nothing in herexcept a village lass, and not a very well-favoured one, for she wasplatter-faced and snub-nosed, he was perplexed and bewildered, and didnot venture to open his lips. The country girls, at the same time, wereastonished to see these two men, so different in appearance, on theirknees, preventing their companion from going on. She, however, who hadbeen stopped, breaking silence, said angrily and testily, "Get out of theway, bad luck to you, and let us pass, for we are in a hurry."To which Sancho returned, "Oh, princess and universal lady of El Toboso,is not your magnanimous heart softened by seeing the pillar and prop ofknight-errantry on his knees before your sublimated presence?"On hearing this, one of the others exclaimed, "Woa then! why, I'm rubbingthee down, she-ass of my father-in-law! See how the lordlings come tomake game of the village girls now, as if we here could not chaff as wellas themselves. Go your own way, and let us go ours, and it will be betterfor you.""Get up, Sancho," said Don Quixote at this; "I see that fortune, 'withevil done to me unsated still,' has taken possession of all the roads bywhich any comfort may reach 'this wretched soul' that I carry in myflesh. And thou, highest perfection of excellence that can be desired,utmost limit of grace in human shape, sole relief of this afflicted heartthat adores thee, though the malign enchanter that persecutes me hasbrought clouds and cataracts on my eyes, and to them, and them only,transformed thy unparagoned beauty and changed thy features into those ofa poor peasant girl, if so be he has not at the same time changed mineinto those of some monster to render them loathsome in thy sight, refusenot to look upon me with tenderness and love; seeing in this submissionthat I make on my knees to thy transformed beauty the humility with whichmy soul adores thee.""Hey-day! My grandfather!" cried the girl, "much I care for yourlove-making! Get out of the way and let us pass, and we'll thank you."Sancho stood aside and let her go, very well pleased to have got so wellout of the hobble he was in. The instant the village lass who had doneduty for Dulcinea found herself free, prodding her "cackney" with a spikeshe had at the end of a stick, she set off at full speed across thefield. The she-ass, however, feeling the point more acutely than usual,began cutting such capers, that it flung the lady Dulcinea to the ground;seeing which, Don Quixote ran to raise her up, and Sancho to fix andgirth the pack-saddle, which also had slipped under the ass's belly. Thepack-saddle being secured, as Don Quixote was about to lift up hisenchanted mistress in his arms and put her upon her beast, the lady,getting up from the ground, saved him the trouble, for, going back alittle, she took a short run, and putting both hands on the croup of theass she dropped into the saddle more lightly than a falcon, and satastride like a man, whereat Sancho said, "Rogue! but our lady is lighterthan a lanner, and might teach the cleverest Cordovan or Mexican how tomount; she cleared the back of the saddle in one jump, and without spursshe is making the hackney go like a zebra; and her damsels are no waybehind her, for they all fly like the wind;" which was the truth, for assoon as they saw Dulcinea mounted, they pushed on after her, and spedaway without looking back, for more than half a league.Don Quixote followed them with his eyes, and when they were no longer insight, he turned to Sancho and said, "How now, Sancho? thou seest how Iam hated by enchanters! And see to what a length the malice and spitethey bear me go, when they seek to deprive me of the happiness it wouldgive me to see my lady in her own proper form. The fact is I was born tobe an example of misfortune, and the target and mark at which the arrowsof adversity are aimed and directed. Observe too, Sancho, that thesetraitors were not content with changing and transforming my Dulcinea, butthey transformed and changed her into a shape as mean and ill-favoured asthat of the village girl yonder; and at the same time they robbed her ofthat which is such a peculiar property of ladies of distinction, that isto say, the sweet fragrance that comes of being always among perfumes andflowers. For I must tell thee, Sancho, that when I approached to putDulcinea upon her hackney (as thou sayest it was, though to me itappeared a she-ass), she gave me a whiff of raw garlic that made my headreel, and poisoned my very heart.""O scum of the earth!" cried Sancho at this, "O miserable, spitefulenchanters! O that I could see you all strung by the gills, like sardineson a twig! Ye know a great deal, ye can do a great deal, and ye do agreat deal more. It ought to have been enough for you, ye scoundrels, tohave changed the pearls of my lady's eyes into oak galls, and her hair ofpurest gold into the bristles of a red ox's tail, and in short, all herfeatures from fair to foul, without meddling with her smell; for by thatwe might somehow have found out what was hidden underneath that uglyrind; though, to tell the truth, I never perceived her ugliness, but onlyher beauty, which was raised to the highest pitch of perfection by a moleshe had on her right lip, like a moustache, with seven or eight red hairslike threads of gold, and more than a palm long.""From the correspondence which exists between those of the face and thoseof the body," said Don Quixote, "Dulcinea must have another moleresembling that on the thick of the thigh on that side on which she hasthe one on her ace; but hairs of the length thou hast mentioned are verylong for moles.""Well, all I can say is there they were as plain as could be," repliedSancho."I believe it, my friend," returned Don Quixote; "for nature bestowednothing on Dulcinea that was not perfect and well-finished; and so, ifshe had a hundred moles like the one thou hast described, in her theywould not be moles, but moons and shining stars. But tell me, Sancho,that which seemed to me to be a pack-saddle as thou wert fixing it, wasit a flat-saddle or a side-saddle?""It was neither," replied Sancho, "but a jineta saddle, with a fieldcovering worth half a kingdom, so rich is it.""And that I could not see all this, Sancho!" said Don Quixote; "once moreI say, and will say a thousand times, I am the most unfortunate of men."Sancho, the rogue, had enough to do to hide his laughter, at hearing thesimplicity of the master he had so nicely befooled. At length, after agood deal more conversation had passed between them, they remounted theirbeasts, and followed the road to Saragossa, which they expected to reachin time to take part in a certain grand festival which is held every yearin that illustrious city; but before they got there things happened tothem, so many, so important, and so strange, that they deserve to berecorded and read, as will be seen farther on.