Chapter 21

by Jane Austen

　　The Palmers returned to Cleveland the next day,and the two families at Barton were again left to entertaineach other. But this did not last long; Elinor had hardlygot their last visitors out of her head, had hardly donewondering at Charlotte's being so happy without a cause,at Mr. Palmer's acting so simply, with good abilities,and at the strange unsuitableness which often existed betweenhusband and wife, before Sir John's and Mrs. Jennings'sactive zeal in the cause of society, procured her someother new acquaintance to see and observe.In a morning's excursion to Exeter, they had met withtwo young ladies, whom Mrs. Jennings had the satisfactionof discovering to be her relations, and this was enoughfor Sir John to invite them directly to the park,as soon as their present engagements at Exeter were over.Their engagements at Exeter instantly gave way beforesuch an invitation, and Lady Middleton was thrown intono little alarm on the return of Sir John, by hearingthat she was very soon to receive a visit from two girlswhom she had never seen in her life, and of whose elegance,--whose tolerable gentility even, she could have no proof;for the assurances of her husband and mother on that subjectwent for nothing at all. Their being her relations toomade it so much the worse; and Mrs. Jennings's attemptsat consolation were therefore unfortunately founded,when she advised her daughter not to care about their beingso fashionable; because they were all cousins and must putup with one another. As it was impossible, however, now toprevent their coming, Lady Middleton resigned herself to theidea of it, with all the philosophy of a well-bred woman,contenting herself with merely giving her husband a gentlereprimand on the subject five or six times every day.The young ladies arrived: their appearance was byno means ungenteel or unfashionable. Their dress wasvery smart, their manners very civil, they were delightedwith the house, and in raptures with the furniture,and they happened to be so doatingly fond of childrenthat Lady Middleton's good opinion was engaged in theirfavour before they had been an hour at the Park.She declared them to be very agreeable girls indeed,which for her ladyship was enthusiastic admiration.Sir John's confidence in his own judgment rose with thisanimated praise, and he set off directly for the cottageto tell the Miss Dashwoods of the Miss Steeles' arrival,and to assure them of their being the sweetest girlsin the world. From such commendation as this, however,there was not much to be learned; Elinor well knewthat the sweetest girls in the world were to be metwith in every part of England, under every possiblevariation of form, face, temper and understanding.Sir John wanted the whole family to walk to the Park directlyand look at his guests. Benevolent, philanthropic man! Itwas painful to him even to keep a third cousin to himself."Do come now," said he--"pray come--you must come--Ideclare you shall come--You can't think how you willlike them. Lucy is monstrous pretty, and so good humouredand agreeable! The children are all hanging about her already,as if she was an old acquaintance. And they both longto see you of all things, for they have heard at Exeterthat you are the most beautiful creatures in the world;and I have told them it is all very true, and a greatdeal more. You will be delighted with them I am sure.They have brought the whole coach full of playthingsfor the children. How can you be so cross as not to come?Why they are your cousins, you know, after a fashion.You are my cousins, and they are my wife's, so you mustbe related."But Sir John could not prevail. He could only obtaina promise of their calling at the Park within a day or two,and then left them in amazement at their indifference,to walk home and boast anew of their attractions to theMiss Steeles, as he had been already boasting of the MissSteeles to them.When their promised visit to the Park and consequentintroduction to these young ladies took place, they foundin the appearance of the eldest, who was nearly thirty,with a very plain and not a sensible face, nothing to admire;but in the other, who was not more than two or threeand twenty, they acknowledged considerable beauty; herfeatures were pretty, and she had a sharp quick eye,and a smartness of air, which though it did not giveactual elegance or grace, gave distinction to her person.--Their manners were particularly civil, and Elinor soonallowed them credit for some kind of sense, when shesaw with what constant and judicious attention theywere making themselves agreeable to Lady Middleton.With her children they were in continual raptures,extolling their beauty, courting their notice, and humouringtheir whims; and such of their time as could be spared fromthe importunate demands which this politeness made on it,was spent in admiration of whatever her ladyship was doing,if she happened to be doing any thing, or in taking patternsof some elegant new dress, in which her appearancethe day before had thrown them into unceasing delight.Fortunately for those who pay their court throughsuch foibles, a fond mother, though, in pursuit of praisefor her children, the most rapacious of human beings,is likewise the most credulous; her demands are exorbitant;but she will swallow any thing; and the excessiveaffection and endurance of the Miss Steeles towardsher offspring were viewed therefore by Lady Middletonwithout the smallest surprise or distrust. She saw withmaternal complacency all the impertinent encroachmentsand mischievous tricks to which her cousins submitted.She saw their sashes untied, their hair pulled abouttheir ears, their work-bags searched, and their knivesand scissors stolen away, and felt no doubt of its beinga reciprocal enjoyment. It suggested no other surprisethan that Elinor and Marianne should sit so composedly by,without claiming a share in what was passing."John is in such spirits today!" said she, on histaking Miss Steeles's pocket handkerchief, and throwingit out of window--"He is full of monkey tricks."And soon afterwards, on the second boy's violentlypinching one of the same lady's fingers, she fondly observed,"How playful William is!""And here is my sweet little Annamaria," she added,tenderly caressing a little girl of three years old,who had not made a noise for the last two minutes;"And she is always so gentle and quiet--Never was theresuch a quiet little thing!"But unfortunately in bestowing these embraces,a pin in her ladyship's head dress slightly scratchingthe child's neck, produced from this pattern of gentlenesssuch violent screams, as could hardly be outdone by anycreature professedly noisy. The mother's consternationwas excessive; but it could not surpass the alarm of theMiss Steeles, and every thing was done by all three,in so critical an emergency, which affection could suggestas likely to assuage the agonies of the little sufferer.She was seated in her mother's lap, covered with kisses,her wound bathed with lavender-water, by one of theMiss Steeles, who was on her knees to attend her,and her mouth stuffed with sugar plums by the other.With such a reward for her tears, the child was too wiseto cease crying. She still screamed and sobbed lustily,kicked her two brothers for offering to touch her, and alltheir united soothings were ineffectual till Lady Middletonluckily remembering that in a scene of similar distresslast week, some apricot marmalade had been successfullyapplied for a bruised temple, the same remedy was eagerlyproposed for this unfortunate scratch, and a slightintermission of screams in the young lady on hearing it,gave them reason to hope that it would not be rejected.--She was carried out of the room therefore in hermother's arms, in quest of this medicine, and as thetwo boys chose to follow, though earnestly entreatedby their mother to stay behind, the four young ladieswere left in a quietness which the room had not known formany hours."Poor little creatures!" said Miss Steele, as soonas they were gone. "It might have been a very sad accident.""Yet I hardly know how," cried Marianne, "unless ithad been under totally different circumstances.But this is the usual way of heightening alarm, where thereis nothing to be alarmed at in reality.""What a sweet woman Lady Middleton is!" said Lucy Steele.Marianne was silent; it was impossible for her to saywhat she did not feel, however trivial the occasion;and upon Elinor therefore the whole task of telling lieswhen politeness required it, always fell. She did herbest when thus called on, by speaking of Lady Middletonwith more warmth than she felt, though with far less thanMiss Lucy."And Sir John too," cried the elder sister,"what a charming man he is!"Here too, Miss Dashwood's commendation, being onlysimple and just, came in without any eclat. She merelyobserved that he was perfectly good humoured and friendly."And what a charming little family they have! Inever saw such fine children in my life.--I declare Iquite doat upon them already, and indeed I am alwaysdistractedly fond of children.""I should guess so," said Elinor, with a smile,"from what I have witnessed this morning.""I have a notion," said Lucy, "you think the littleMiddletons rather too much indulged; perhaps they may be theoutside of enough; but it is so natural in Lady Middleton;and for my part, I love to see children full of lifeand spirits; I cannot bear them if they are tame and quiet.""I confess," replied Elinor, "that while I am atBarton Park, I never think of tame and quiet childrenwith any abhorrence."A short pause succeeded this speech, which was firstbroken by Miss Steele, who seemed very much disposedfor conversation, and who now said rather abruptly,"And how do you like Devonshire, Miss Dashwood? I supposeyou were very sorry to leave Sussex."In some surprise at the familiarity of this question,or at least of the manner in which it was spoken,Elinor replied that she was."Norland is a prodigious beautiful place, is not it?"added Miss Steele."We have heard Sir John admire it excessively,"said Lucy, who seemed to think some apology necessaryfor the freedom of her sister."I think every one must admire it," replied Elinor,"who ever saw the place; though it is not to be supposedthat any one can estimate its beauties as we do.""And had you a great many smart beaux there? Isuppose you have not so many in this part of the world;for my part, I think they are a vast addition always.""But why should you think," said Lucy, looking ashamedof her sister, "that there are not as many genteel youngmen in Devonshire as Sussex?""Nay, my dear, I'm sure I don't pretend to say that therean't. I'm sure there's a vast many smart beaux in Exeter;but you know, how could I tell what smart beaux theremight be about Norland; and I was only afraid the MissDashwoods might find it dull at Barton, if they had notso many as they used to have. But perhaps you young ladiesmay not care about the beaux, and had as lief be withoutthem as with them. For my part, I think they are vastlyagreeable, provided they dress smart and behave civil.But I can't bear to see them dirty and nasty. Now there'sMr. Rose at Exeter, a prodigious smart young man,quite a beau, clerk to Mr. Simpson, you know, and yet if youdo but meet him of a morning, he is not fit to be seen.--I suppose your brother was quite a beau, Miss Dashwood,before he married, as he was so rich?""Upon my word," replied Elinor, "I cannot tell you,for I do not perfectly comprehend the meaning of the word.But this I can say, that if he ever was a beau beforehe married, he is one still for there is not the smallestalteration in him.""Oh! dear! one never thinks of married men's beingbeaux--they have something else to do.""Lord! Anne," cried her sister, "you can talk ofnothing but beaux;--you will make Miss Dashwood believe youthink of nothing else." And then to turn the discourse,she began admiring the house and the furniture.This specimen of the Miss Steeles was enough.The vulgar freedom and folly of the eldest lefther no recommendation, and as Elinor was not blindedby the beauty, or the shrewd look of the youngest,to her want of real elegance and artlessness, she leftthe house without any wish of knowing them better.Not so the Miss Steeles.--They came from Exeter, wellprovided with admiration for the use of Sir John Middleton,his family, and all his relations, and no niggardlyproportion was now dealt out to his fair cousins, whom theydeclared to be the most beautiful, elegant, accomplished,and agreeable girls they had ever beheld, and with whomthey were particularly anxious to be better acquainted.--And to be better acquainted therefore, Elinor soon foundwas their inevitable lot, for as Sir John was entirelyon the side of the Miss Steeles, their party would betoo strong for opposition, and that kind of intimacymust be submitted to, which consists of sitting an houror two together in the same room almost every day.Sir John could do no more; but he did not know that anymore was required: to be together was, in his opinion,to be intimate, and while his continual schemes for theirmeeting were effectual, he had not a doubt of their beingestablished friends.To do him justice, he did every thing in his powerto promote their unreserve, by making the Miss Steelesacquainted with whatever he knew or supposed of his cousins'situations in the most delicate particulars,--and Elinorhad not seen them more than twice, before the eldest ofthem wished her joy on her sister's having been so luckyas to make a conquest of a very smart beau since shecame to Barton."'Twill be a fine thing to have her married so youngto be sure," said she, "and I hear he is quite a beau,and prodigious handsome. And I hope you may have as goodluck yourself soon,--but perhaps you may have a friendin the corner already."Elinor could not suppose that Sir John would be morenice in proclaiming his suspicions of her regard for Edward,than he had been with respect to Marianne; indeed it wasrather his favourite joke of the two, as being somewhatnewer and more conjectural; and since Edward's visit,they had never dined together without his drinking to herbest affections with so much significancy and so many nodsand winks, as to excite general attention. The letter F--had been likewise invariably brought forward, and foundproductive of such countless jokes, that its characteras the wittiest letter in the alphabet had been longestablished with Elinor.The Miss Steeles, as she expected, had now all thebenefit of these jokes, and in the eldest of them theyraised a curiosity to know the name of the gentlemanalluded to, which, though often impertinently expressed,was perfectly of a piece with her general inquisitivenessinto the concerns of their family. But Sir John did notsport long with the curiosity which he delighted to raise,for he had at least as much pleasure in telling the name,as Miss Steele had in hearing it."His name is Ferrars," said he, in a very audible whisper;"but pray do not tell it, for it's a great secret.""Ferrars!" repeated Miss Steele; "Mr. Ferrars isthe happy man, is he? What! your sister-in-law's brother,Miss Dashwood? a very agreeable young man to be sure;I know him very well.""How can you say so, Anne?" cried Lucy, who generallymade an amendment to all her sister's assertions."Though we have seen him once or twice at my uncle's, itis rather too much to pretend to know him very well."Elinor heard all this with attention and surprise."And who was this uncle? Where did he live? How camethey acquainted?" She wished very much to have the subjectcontinued, though she did not chuse to join in it herself;but nothing more of it was said, and for the first timein her life, she thought Mrs. Jennings deficient eitherin curiosity after petty information, or in a dispositionto communicate it. The manner in which Miss Steele hadspoken of Edward, increased her curiosity; for it struckher as being rather ill-natured, and suggested the suspicionof that lady's knowing, or fancying herself to know somethingto his disadvantage.--But her curiosity was unavailing,for no farther notice was taken of Mr. Ferrars's name byMiss Steele when alluded to, or even openly mentioned by SirJohn.