CHAPTER TWO

by Ellis Parker Butler

　　When the two men were comfortably settled in the shade and had lightedtheir pipes, Eph, as the senior in the trade and the party with acomplaint, opened his mouth to speak; but before the words came forth,Phineas outflanked him and let fly a thunderbolt.

　　"Eph," he said, "you got to lower down your pie prices to even up withwhat mine are."

　　Eph looked at his companion in astonishment.

　　"Lower down my prices!" he ejaculated. "You be crazy, Phin; plum crazy!Don't I give a bigger pie an' a better pie than what you do?"

　　"Well, then," remarked Phineas, with a sly twinkle in his eye, "how doyou reckon I can h'ist my prices up any? Mebby you think I can git tencents fer a small, mean pie whiles you ask ten cents fer a big, goodone? My idee is that if we want to run along nice an' smooth, an' nothave no trouble, what we want to do is to git together an' go incahoots, an' then it don't make no difference what we sell at."

　　"I'm ag'in' trusts," said Eph, coldly.

　　"So'm I," said Phineas. "Who said anything about trusts? All we wantis to even things up a bit. Fust thing you know, you'll git mad an'cut your prices down to eight cents, an' I'll have to drop to six; an'you'll come to six, an' I'll go to four; an' you'll go to four, an' I'llsell pies at two; an' you'll put your pies down to two cents, an'blame my hide if I don't give pies away. Dog me if I don't!"

　　Eph looked worried. "Oh, come now, Phin," he said anxiously, "you won'tup an' do that, will you?"

　　"Dog me if I don't!" Phin repeated stubbornly.

　　Eph arose and shook his fist at Phineas.

　　"You old ijit!" he yelled. "I'll teach ye!" And bending over, he seizeda large, soft pie and slapped it down over the head of the seatedPhineas. In a moment the two men were standing face to face, fistsclenched, and breath coming short and fast, each waiting for the otherto strike the first blow.

　　But neither struck. Eph's eyes fell to Phineas's shoulder, where a largefragment of pie had lodged. Phineas moved slightly and the pie fragmentwavered, tottered, and--Eph reached out his hand quickly to catch it,and Phineas dodged and, closing in, grasped him around the waist andpulled down. Eph sank upon his knees and Phineas followed him, and thetwo men, nose to nose, eye to eye, looked at each other and grinned.

　　"If we're goin' to fight this thing out," said Eph, "let's go over inthe shade an' set down. It's too blame hot fer wrastlin'."