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A Very Human Ending
A Very Human Ending
Oct 11, 2024 2:16 AM

Author:Jesse Bering

A Very Human Ending

'I have yet to come away from reading [Bering's] work and not feel considerably better informed than I was minutes before' (Forbes)

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This penetrating analysis aims to demystify a subject that knows no cultural or demographic boundaries.

Why do people want to kill themselves?

Despite the prevalence of suicide in the developed world, it's a question most of us fail to ask. On hearing news of a suicide we are devastated, but overwhelmingly we feel disbelief.

In A Very Human Ending, research psychologist Jesse Bering lifts the lid on this taboo subject, examining the suicidal mindset from the inside out to reveal the subtle tricks the mind can play when we're easy emotional prey. In raising challenging questions Bering tests our contradictory superstitions about the act itself.

Combining cutting-edge research with investigative journalism and first-person testimony, Bering also addresses the history of suicide and its evolutionary inheritance to offer a personal, accessible, yet scientifically sound examination of why we are the only species on earth that deliberately ends its own life.

Reviews

Jesse Bering asks the questions no one else dares, he tells truths that others shy away from, and he writes the books that I wish I had written. To me, he is everything a great scientist and communicator should be. Suicide may be an uncomfortable subject yet the escalating numbers of people who take their lives each year means we must make it’s unravelling our priority. I have no doubt this book will have a profound impact on all who read it, and add considerably to our understanding of that self-willed oblivion, whether it lies palpably just beneath our own skin, or the skins of those we love. But perhaps most importantly of all it will help dispel the stigma and shame that so perniciously clings to all suicides.

—— Dr Christian Jessen

A brave and important exploration of a subject we urgently need to demystify. It will change every reader for the better.

—— Derren Brown

Bering's book touches upon some deep questions relevant to all of us. Indeed, it is as much about what makes us uniquely human as it is about suicide. A Very Human Ending transcends its own objectives. It is a fascinating, thoughtful, unflinching meditation on one of the most intriguing and curious aspects of the human condition.

—— Dr Frank Tallis, clinical psychologist , Evening Standard

I'm not surprised that a book on suicide would be very personal, but I didn’t expect it to be so damn funny. It's also engaging, thoughtful, and sensitive – although Bering is certainly irreverent, there is a real appreciation of how painful and difficult this topic can be. This is a book for scholars and for a general audience, but it is also entirely suitable for people whose lives have been touched by the suicide of someone they loved.

—— Paul Bloom, Professor of Psychology at Yale University and author of Against Empathy

I have yet to come away from reading [Bering’s] work and not feel considerably better informed than I was just minutes before

—— Forbes

A coherent, relevant look at the psychological secrets of suicide... a fascinating study featuring some startling real-time facts and perspectives on a sadly enduring phenomenon. For such a fiercely complex subject with varying nuances, viewpoints, and interpretations, Bering imparts accessible information through an affable, conversational tone. This important book arms readers with contemporary insight to help "short-circuit the powerful impetus to die when things look calamitous." Bering illuminates a murky, misunderstood human quandary with compassion, confessional honesty, and academic perception.

—— Kirkus

Compelling... This isn't just a mix of statistics, academic arguments and moving case studies. Bering also writes from the inside as one who, since his teenage years, has at times felt the "call to oblivion". Bering's remit is broad and he builds towards his conclusions on a solid basis of research that throws up some arresting statistics. He labours not just to size up what remains an epidemic shrouded in silence and shame, but also to suggest ways forward.

—— Guardian

Sadly, the mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation, our minds forever pulling us into dark forests. But there are numerous stages at which we can step off that path before it's too late. Drawing on research evidence and the world around us, Bering signposts and, we can hope, saves.

—— Dr Jon Sutton ,
editor of The Psychologist

Suicide is one of the toughest subjects to write about, and psychologist Jesse Bering does it with candor, scientific integrity and genuine empathy. A Very Human Ending is a vital book - informative, engaging and enlightening despite its dark subject matter.

—— Scott Neuffer , Shelf Awareness

Highly enlightening... Bering carefully balances his avid curiosity with deep compassion in this look at how suicidal urges work. Throughout, Bering treats his sources with unvarying respect, as well as a spirit of affiliation. Readers who have experienced the anguish of suicidal impulses will find his work both heartening and deeply illuminating.

—— Publishers Weekly

Why do more than a million people a year kill themselves? To answer this question we need a brilliant research scientist, an insightful psychologist, and a sensitive but powerful writer who has seriously contemplated taking their own life. Jesse Bering fits all three criteria and this book is a deeply moving narrative that cuts to the heart of the ultimate question any of us could ever ask: why should I live? Given what’s at stake in the topic, A Very Human Ending may very well be the most important book you will ever read.

——
Michael Shermer, monthly columnist for Scientific American and author of The Believing Brain, The Moral Arc and Heavens on Earth

Jesse Bering explores one of the most essential questions we all face: Why keep living? He doesn't claim to have found any easy answers, but his exploration is surprising, funny, touching, and deeply personal. A Very Human Ending feels like a gift, and reading it reminded me that encounters with great books are reason enough, for now, to keep going.

——
Christopher Ryan, author of Tangentially Reading and Sex at Dawn

Jesse Bering is the best science writer at work today.

—— Dan Savage

A necessary contribution to the demystification of a subject still under discussed, Bering’s book is wise, warm and sure to encourage conversation

—— Irish Times

Wang is a brilliant writer. . . . This intimate essay collection grapples with her diagnosis of schizoaffective disorder and all the sorrow and searching that comes with it. Always artful and illuminating, never facile

—— Vulture

Wang's clear-eyed look into a complicated reality makes this is an essential read for anyone who better wants to understand why we treat each other--and ourselves--so harshly at any display of weakness; it's a book of compassion and brilliance, an unflinching look at a topic that has long repelled too many of us.

—— NYLON

Esmé Weijun Wang's compelling essays highlight the humanity behind a schizophrenia diagnosis, delivering a necessary read tackling mental illness

—— Paste

Wang creates an unforgettable portrait of a singular brain

—— Refinery29

Wang is a highly articulate and graceful essayist, and her insights, in both the clinical and general senses, are exceptional.

—— Los Angeles Review of Books

Wang writes brilliantly and beautifully about lives lived with mental illness

—— The Millions

In writing about her experiences, Wang puts a face to the silent suffering of millions of people. Her searing honesty coupled with the strength of her writing make The Collected Schizophrenias a remarkable look into a little-understood part of the human condition

—— Chicago Review of Books

An illuminating, breathtaking look into the underexplored world of schizophrenia, with the rare perspective of someone who's actually been there

—— mindbodygreen

Wang . . . eloquently balances personal narrative and empirical research to offer a powerful series of insights into a woefully misunderstood world.

—— SF Weekly

This beautifully written work will expand your thinking about severe mental illness and mental illness in general

—— Rewire.News

The Collected Schizophrenias is illumination and important--not only because it educates and challenges--but because it forces us to consider how much we still have to work to undo historical and systematic damage, to challenge our own broken, misguided partiality towards what it means to be healthy and sane

—— The Arkansas International

[The Collected Schizophrenias] organizes the confusion, terror and complexity of [Wang's] experience into an imperfectly cohesive, profoundly illuminating whole.

—— Shelf Awareness

Penetrating and revelatory.

—— Publisher's Weekly

This mesmerizing collection of essays has achieved the rarest of rarities--a meaningful and expansive language for a subject that has been long bound by both deep revulsion and intense fascination

—— Jenny Zhang

A brilliant guide to the complexities of thinking about illness, and mental illness, in particular. It will bring hope to others searching to understand their own diagnoses

—— Meghan O'Rourke

A masterful braiding of the achingly personal and the incisively researched. . . . This book is a vital, illuminating window onto the world we all already live in, but find all too easy to ignore

—— Alexandra Kleeman

You won't find any pity-baiting, sensationalism, or false positivity here; Wang is so candidly aware that I'd trust her over my own diary

—— Tony Tulathimutte

Esmé Weijun Wang offers us an all-access pass to her beautiful, unquiet mind. . . Rarely has a book about living with mental illness felt so immediate, raw, and powerful

—— Dani Shapiro

The Collected Schizophrenias is at once generous and brilliantly nuanced, rigorous and bold. It had me rethinking what it is to be well or ill.

—— R.O. Kwon

Esmé Weijun Wang sends out revelatory dispatches from an under-mapped land, shot like arrows in all directions from a taut bow of a mind. . . . Her work changes the way we think about illness - which is to say that it changes us

—— Whiting Award Selection Committee

A remarkable book - intelligent, impassioned, consistently moving - that can’t help but make readers revisit the sharpest spikes of life, where nurses often are. Christie Watson looks directly at the fragility of human existence, and the importance of what we choose to value. I can't think of many better uses of writing, nor of writing more likely to make me a better person

—— Richard Beard

I defy anyone to finish this without weeping and giving thanks to the NHS ... An important book that should be on every reading list

—— Fanny Blake , Woman & Home

Christie Watson’s book brings home the incredible strength and determination that nurses working in our critically underfunded NHS must possess – and how wildly underappreciated they are

—— Rachael Jolley, Editor, Index on Censorship

Gripping and tender

—— Radio Times

A remarkable reflection on care, empathy and compassion ... packs massive emotional impact ... I urge you to read it

—— Caroline Sanderson , The Bookseller

This tender, truth-telling memoir will break your heart into little pieces ... This book is a salient reminder that at some point we are all going to need care and we can only hope we'll get someone like Christie who understands the need for "sympathy, compassion, empathy" in our most vulnerable moments

—— Eithne Farry , The Simple Things

The award-winning novelist writes about her 20 years as a nurse, taking us from life to death of the wards in a moving account

—— Hannah Beckerman , Sunday Express

As Watson observes, the ability to step into another’s shoes is essential for both nurse and novelist. So too is an eagle eye, and it is the details that prove so unforgettable ... I found myself compelled to go back, and freshly moved and humbled

—— Stephanie Cross , The Lady

A highly emotional and eloquent retelling of different patients, staffers, experiences and departments ... A much-needed human voice

—— Tanya Sweeney , The Irish Times

[Watson] writes with such considered awareness of medical procedure and resources, human frailty and resilience, that you know she dug deep for this book ... You are also privy to an extraordinary world and appreciate Watson's lasting belief: that most of us are inherently kind - and the better for showing it

—— Kerry Fowler , Sainsbury's Magazine

The Language of Kindness is teeming with humanity ... [It] puts other memoirs to shame, by narrating an ordinary working life which nevertheless confronts the dark, the sublime, the transcendental

—— Roisin Kiberd , Sunday Business Post

Her book makes harrowing, heart-rendering reading.

—— Helen Brown , Daily Mail

An engaging and authentic portrait of modern care ... Through Watson’s inclusion of relevant statistics and historical facts, as well as her meticulous observation skills, readers will better understand the value of nurses

—— Library Journal

Hypnotic prose ... quiet brilliance ... This is a wake-up book in the best possible way, a study in-the-round: amusing, hilarious even, enthralling and sad, and definitely an indictment of our time

—— The Arts Desk

We hear far less often from nurses and therapists… It’s time we heard their side of the story. And who better to tell it than this nurse-turned-award-winning literary novelist.

—— Charlotte Heathcote , Sunday Express

Anecdotal story-telling wrapped up in hypnotic prose… This is a wake-up book in the best possible way, a study in-the-round: amusing, hilarious even, enthralling and sad, and definitely an indictment of our time.

—— Marina Vaizey , The Arts Desk

A remarkable book. I learned more in chapter 3 than I have in all the other books I’ve read this year. Watson illustrates why a nurse has a harder job than 99 per cent of lawyers (I am one) and deserves to be paid more. Absolutely brilliant!

—— Clive Stafford Smith OBE, human rights lawyer

The Language of Kindness flows so beautifully, and naturally. Christie adds real warmth to very factual, and medical information … I urge all of you to read this book

—— Five Little Doves

[Watson] beautifully describes the life-affirming impact of nurses doing and saying the right thing

—— Strong Words

[Watson] tells us things we need to know

—— Chisholm , The Tablet

[The Language of Kindness is] a tender and beautifully written account of how this process – learning how to be kind – challenges, teaches, sometimes harms, and then completes a person

—— Peter Dorward , Telegraph

At the heart of Christie Watson’s philanthropic memoir…lies a remarkable thesis on life, death and the kaleidoscopic narratives…that weave us together

—— Kat Lister , The Pool

This stunning read reminds us that nurses are human after all

—— Jude Rogers , Mail on Sunday

Christie Watson's memoir of 20 years as an NHS nurse is completely absorbing. The best books tell us about life as well as lives and I've read nothing recently that I found so moving and, even in its descriptions of suffering and death, so uplifting. Watson has an eye for detail that is practical, compassionate and very often funny

—— Lucy Lethbridge , The Tablet

Christie captures life as a nurse in the humblest manner, and anyone in or considering nursing is encouraged to read it

—— Julia Williams , Gastrointestinal Nursing

Watson’s prose…fizzes with real life, each story and encounter containing its own epic narrative sweep

—— Lucy Lethbridge , The Oldie

This brilliant and profound book left an indelible mark on me this year

—— Ian Birrell , i

Moving and compassionate…The Language of Kindness… is a sensitive, perceptive and blunt account of a nurse’s journey

—— Richard Barr , Solicitors Journal

An astounding account of life as a nurse

—— Liz Nice , Eastern Daily Press

The Language of Kindness exerts the power of a gripping novel threaded with science, philosophy, history and ethics. Like poetry, it resists paraphrase. A quick summary is out of the question, this brilliant life-changing book has to be experienced.

—— Martina Evans , Irish Times

Watson evokes the topography of each arm of nursing in vivid detail.

—— Irish Times

I defy anyone to finish this without weeping and giving thanks for the NHS… An important book that should be on every reading list.

—— Fanny Blake , Woman & Home

The Language of Kindness could not be more compelling or more welcome. It's about how we survive, and about the people who help us do so

—— Roxana Robinson , New York Times Book Review

[A] powerful account of her life as a nurse… reading her memoir is a truly uplifting experience.

—— Jacqueline Wilson , The Week

A nurse’s voice has never really been heard before on this scale. Now’s the time for it to ring loud.

—— Stylist

[Watson] is an elegant, eloquent writer who brings an immediacy to her work. You are right there beside her all the way as she provides a fascinating insight into the trails and triumphs of life in an NHS hospital… a rallying call for kindness and compassion that every one of us should embrace.

—— Mernie Gilmore , Sunday Express

Through Watson, we are taken on an absorbing, all-seeing tour through the doors of the hospital

—— Molly Case , Guardian
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