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What Dementia Teaches Us About Love
What Dementia Teaches Us About Love
Oct 9, 2024 2:18 AM

Author:Nicci Gerrard

What Dementia Teaches Us About Love

A SUNDAY TIMES, NEW STATESMAN AND FINANCIAL TIMES BOOK OF THE YEAR

'Immensely powerful . . . her investigation of this terrible illness is sensitive and compelling' Sunday Times

After her own father's death from dementia, the writer and campaigner Nicci Gerrard set out to explore the illness that now touches millions of us, yet which we still struggle to speak about. What does dementia mean, for those who live with it, and those who care for them?

This truthful, humane book is an attempt to understand. It is filled with stories, both moving and optimistic: from those living with dementia to those planning the end of life, from the scientists unlocking the mysteries of the brain to the therapists using art and music to enrich the lives of sufferers, from the campaigners battling for greater compassion in care to the families trying to make sense of this 'incomprehensible de-creation of the self'.

Reviews

Immensely powerful . . . an incisive and compelling read. Gerrard, a crime novelist and former journalist, visits the "fresh hell" of hospitals across the UK, and interviews sufferers and those whose lives have been indelibly shaped by the diagnosis of a loved one . . . As well as being part-memoir and part-reportage, What Dementia Teaches Us About Love is also a great part philosophical inquiry into the nature of self and what it is to be human.

—— The Sunday Times

Essential reading about love, life and care

—— Kate Mosse , author of Labyrinth

An extraordinarily luminous book, at once terribly sad and frightening but also somehow hopeful and energising.

—— Nick Duerden , Independent

Nobody has written on dementia as well as Nicci Gerrard in this new book. Kind, knowing and infinitely useful

—— Andrew Marr

Gerrard ranges widely and wisely, raising questions about what it is to be human and facing truths too deep for tears

—— Blake Morrison, poet and author of And When Did You Last See Your Father?

This is a tender, lyrical, profound, urgent book . . . Gerrard has penned a treatise on what it is to be human

—— Yasmin Alibhai-Brown , columnist and author

Evocative and powerful, shining a light on a world which is often hidden and misunderstood

—— Jane Cummings, Chief Nursing Officer for England

Gerrard writes beautifully, encyclopaedically and with humanity

—— Nicholas Timmins , senior fellow at the Institute for Government and the King’s Fund, honorary fellow of Royal College of Physicians, author of Five Giants

Nicci Gerrard exudes understanding of the breadth, scale and complexity of the dementias and the challenges they pose for society. Yet she communicates simply, personally and practically as if speaking individually to each of us

—— Sebastian Crutch , Professor of Neuropsychology, Dementia Research Centre, University College London

Nicci Gerrard writes with power, insight, empathy and extraordinary beauty about the world of dementia . . . and demonstrates how we can address the fear, despair and ignorance that has accompanied its spread

—— Paul Webster , editor of the Observer

Immensely powerful . . . shot through with insights. Gerrard's book is an elegant yet devastating interrogation into this fatal loss of self, and is part-reportage, part-philosophical inquiry, but, above all, intensely personal.

—— Helen Davies , The Sunday Times (Books of the Year)

A profound and powerful exploration of how society interprets and deals with a health challenge that will only deepen over the coming decades

—— Anjana Ahuja , Financial Times (Essential Reads 2019)

I have valued Samantha Harvey's company through her memoir of insomnia, The Shapeless Unease. Harvey's description of not sleeping as a kind of assault feels utterly true.

—— Emilie Pine , Irish Times *Best Books of 2020*

A small miracle of a book. Reading it feels like its own kind of lucid dream … You would imagine a book written in such circumstances would have a hazy quality, but in fact its clarity of expression is startling. It's a fireworks display. It's also a profound meditation on language and loss and time, and on how we construct ourselves through stories. And it's painful. And it's beautiful. And I love it. Samantha Harvey is the most exceptionally gifted of authors, and here she demonstrates that she can literally do anything.

—— Nathan Filer

I am still shuddering, almost, from the beautiful, beautiful writing and its broken, angry, vibrant demand – a dare almost – to accept life, and brave it, with all it brings.

—— Cynan Jones

A creative account of a life with little sleep… Readers looking for their own cure will instead find an erudite companion to help them through the dark times.

—— Helen Davies , Sunday Times

It's funny, sad, wry, always worrying away at the mystery of sleep and its absence and finding endless new angles so that the whole has something of the quality of those waking dreams that haunt the insomniac and are her private country.

—— Andrew Miller

A slim, intense memoir about her own year-long experience of nocturnal unrest… a torture Harvey describes with a combination of desperation, wry humour and — despite the scarcity she is subjected to — a deeply felt sense of life’s abundance… [her] proseglows off the page: an exacting inquisition of the self leading to imperfect peace.

—— Catherine Taylor , Financial Times

[Harvey is] brilliant on words and the nature of writing.

—— Roger Alton , Daily Express

[With The Shapeless Unease] Harvey has certainly proved that insomnia, as much as any of the more obviously nasty diseases, might be as worthy a subject of literature as love, battle or jealousy…her book rises to that level.

—— Jake Kerridge , Sunday Telegraph

[A] bravely exposing deep dive into the emotional murk of her [Havey’s] restless mind….[it] reveals…the irresistible writerly impulse to pin experience to the page.

—— Anthony Cummins , i

[The Shapeless Unease] reads like a dream sequence… Even reading this made me feel dizzy… [Harvey is] a vigorous, eloquent writer… she conveys the way sleeplessness takes you into the death zone of life.

—— Ysenda Maxtone Graham , Tablet

Mesmerising…at times, bitingly funny… [The Shapeless Unease is] an engrossing portrait of the fragility of identity and coherency in the grip of insomnia. I hadn’t read Harvey before this, but her facility with language here captivated me and I’ll be seeking out her novels next.

—— Valerie O’Riordan , Bookmunch

Urgent and full of arresting images and insights.

—— Stephanie Cross , Lady

[The Shapeless Unease] is littered with sharp insights expressed in exquisitely lucid prose but is as amorphous as its title suggests.

—— Keiron Pim , Spectator

It’s a claustrophobic, enlightening, moving, existential treatise on sleep, insomnia and death. And it’s funny, too.

—— Sadie Jones , Guardian

I wish I had saved The Shapeless Unease to read in isolation but Samantha Harvey’s book about insomnia, time, death and so many unknowable things is a blessing to have in lonely times. It is a profound and stunning book but funny, too.

—— Fatima Bhutto , Evening Standard

A beautiful, jagged little book about insomnia and so many unknowable things: life and death, Buddhism, and how language alters our thinking. But I was most struck by its form and structure.

—— Fatima Bhutto , New Statesman

[Samantha Harvey's] cerebral, startlingly clear account of somehow pulling through [from insomnia] carries an electric charge and meditates on not only the mystery of sleep but also writing, swimming and dreams.

—— Net-a-Porter

[The Shapeless Unease] is beautifully crafted and its achievement makes itself more apparent on a second reading.

—— Richard Gwyn , Wales Art Review

A masterpiece, so good I can hardly breathe. I'm completely floored by it.

—— Helen Macdonald

This book seems appropriately messy-haired and wild-eyed... Anyone who has lain awake the night before a big test will recognize such manic flourishes. Harvey captures the 4 a.m. bloom of magical thinking; stories proliferate within stories... To read Harvey is to grow spoiled on gorgeous phrases.

—— Katy Waldman , New Yorker
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